Right Radio, Wrong Radio

In my life, the radio is always on. It's on right now, broadcasting Talk of the Nation; Neil Conan discussing a controversial Massachusetts law requesting restaurants to post calories on menus. Earlier, while driving home from yoga I was listening to another station, some wild card of a station I found by pressing the seek button a few days ago. I could only smirk as the hosts of the show colorfully and energetically dismissed global warming.

"Were there SUVS back in the Ice Age!?" one of them cries. "Did the dinosaurs ride around in SUVS?!" scoffing at the notion that carbon emissions from vehicles account for global climate change.God, I love the freedom of press. The wide soap box where anyone can stand up and yell lies just as loud as anyone can yell truths."Scientists are always groping with a million excuses global warming exists!"

The other chimes in, using his skills of comparison to drive home his point.

"It's like when you wake up in the morning and in the afternoon it's a little warmer. We can only ASSUME the temperature is going to get hotter and hotter during the day right?! I mean, if it's cool in the morning and hotter in the afternoon we can ASSUME by the end of the week it's going to be like a thousand degrees!"

Such an example so rich in brilliance, how could anyone believe in global warming if trends throughout our day remain consistent? Here's another good example: if I heat up some water it's only logical that if global warming is correct the water will only continue to heat up, eventually surpassing the temperature of the sun if I leave the gas on long enough. Genius.

Even as I smirk, the same little smile I gave the kid next store who told me he grinded his freshly painted skateboard on my roof and landed on my deck (which he claimed explained the paint splatters), I kind of feel like puking at the thought of some schmuck nodding his head in his big fat SUV saying "YEAH! THAT'S RIGHT! DINOSAURS IN SUVS?!?! BULLSHIT!"

And, like always, following the times when I do face extreme denial of clear and consequential evidence I put my hands together, close my eyes, and drop my head,

"Dear Obama, please please please make these stupid idiots go away or please please please give them the intelligence to see beyond ridiculous fallacies in argument and produce some kind of real argument. I swear to you, Obama, I will drive my car less, recycle, and give a percentage of my income to a nonprofit if you just make these people SHUT UP. In your name, Amen."